Sorry I asked... But don't judge me either.

It seems that me asking for help with donations toward my bariatric surgery has risen a polemic and drama that I really don't want. It has mixed with the fact that I'm asking a membership of $10 annually toward the payment of the group at NING for the Spanish-speaking Tatters.

Let me explain first about the Ning money. When Ning decided to ask for the network creator a quote for the use of Ning, I looked for alternative in about a dozen of places. None of them worked as good as Ning and the members in consensus opt to pay the membership of $10 annually to keep the network and all the applications that it has, specially the storage space. There are some people that have problem paying the membership and in each case I have say, it's ok to stay in the group. Even other members have given more than their share of money to help others to stay. Members that can't pay for whatever reason will be able to stay in the group with limited participation. Now, people that are protesting about the money is because $10 per member, and the group have over 1000 members, will give me a lot of money and I'll be rich! But what they don't see is that not all of those members are active, there are people that enter once or twice to see what's in the group and then don't enter anymore. There are people that enter to "steal" material, patterns and photos. So doing a cleaning of all those the group will be greatly reduce to around 100-150 members. Still a lot of money? Well, the rest of the money will be used on the group anyway. The web site has a maintenance around $100 per year. There are contests that will receive material prizes. There will be a better classroom for the online classes. And what if I want to ask for some money for the time I dedicate to the searching of material, translations, designing and classes... Is that bad? Should I give all my time for free? Unfortunately I can't because I don't work and don't have a salary, only a pension which half of it is spent in medicines. Even members have suggested that I could use some of that money to travel and give classes in other countries, something I won't do if this will bring more flame and drama.

Now, about my bariatric surgery. I asked some help because I really need the surgery, not for cosmetic reasons but for my serious health condition. I don't like to talk a lot about it because it's depressing and some people don't like to hear this kind of things because they have their own problems. But I will say it. Yes, my health is very bad, is deteriorating each day more and there's no cure for it. The bariatric surgery will help to diminish some of the secondary health problems, but it will not CURE my Lupus or Asthma. I found some help toward the surgery and that's really good, but still I will need to fund some deductibles and expenses that right now I don't have money and will never have, to be sincere. And I"m not asking money for nothing on exchange. I placed my links to 2 of my online shops. You can buy whatever you want. If you don't want to buy anything but will like to make a donation, fine! I'll appreciate it enormously. I'm not forcing people to buy and make donations!

Saying all this... I have been call a fraud and make me look like all I'm asking is money for my selfish self. That hurts a lot! All my life I have to fight to stay alive, achieve a lot of things that people get for granted. Seven years ago I started this movement to promote Tatting in Spanish. I started translating WITH permissions, materials and patterns. Started the online class in Spanish. Designed a lot of patterns and made a lot of projects, just so that people learned this art. What I gain from this? Stealing of my patterns and translations, illegal publishing of material in my website and group. Tons of fights with my family about the time I spent in the freaking computer and tatting, forgetting a lot of time to do my chores.

So I won't allow ANYONE to call me a fraud! Just because I'm asking some money to help myself to get better health and so I can continue teaching tatting. You don't know all the sacrifices, tears, stress and anxieties I have been through in my life. All the close calls that even my family thought "this is it, the end of Wally's life". Don't judge me because I asked for $10 annually so you can learn an art that anywhere will cost you a lot more! And as I said at the end of the last post. PRAYERS are also very well received.

Sorry I asked for money. I just wanted to get better.